His hand in it all.

It makes me laugh a little when I think about turning 31... It's hard to believe I'll be over 30. I used to think anything over 29 was old!! But man am I excited!!

When I look at my life it makes me smile. A huge smile. I have a husband who is truly my best friend, even after 11 years of marriage. Two wonderful boys who bring me more joy than I could ever explain, the best friends a girl could ask for and an amazing family who I am so blessed to have near.

Last year I really didn't think Id be celebrating my 31st Birthday. But The Lord has once again poured out his blessings on us.

I realize that not a single person is guaranteed another day, let alone another year.  That's a thought that crosses my mind several times a day.

It's kind of ironic that just as I think about celebrating, I received a call tonight that a very special man in my life had a heart attack yesterday. So thankful to God that he is doing ok.

As his wife told me of the days events, we were able to point out the blessings that God had provided that day. How amazing is that?? I just love how good God is. He takes a situation that is so incredibly scary, and comforts us by showing us His hand in all of it. He IS in control and I love to see the ways He continually proves it. It's like He's holding our hand and reassuring us "I'm here, trust me."  I don't know about you but that gives me so much peace. Also makes me very thankful for each and every moment.

 I know that Heaven will be so much better than anything on earth. But I must admit, I'm excited to see what my 31st year holds. Then maybe even 80???

Can't wait to write about turning 32. But in the mean time, thank you so much Lord for for this day. Your mercies and blessings are new every morning.

Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:16 NIV)

Kicking butt and taking names!!

I've found myself feeling a little down lately. There are so many things I would like to do but it's like there is always something holding me back. Whether it's my vision or just feeling exhausted and not having the energy. I have a ton of great intentions but never seem to get the ball rolling.
 (I just have to add this in. It's really early in the morning and as I write this, and big G's hand is resting on my shoulder. My strength and encourager. Love this kid. And love that he still gets excited about having a sleep over with his Mama while Dad is working on the weekends!!)
Anyway. The more I think and pray about it I'm realizing that this in itself is another battle. Satan wants me to feel like crap. He wants me to sleep all the time and tell myself that I can't do these things. He wants me to sit back and do nothing while each day slips away.
Now I know I need to take it easy and take time to rest. But I have decided that I refuse to let this bring me down. It has definitely changed me and I'm sure it will continue to. But change isn't always bad. Different yes. But it can be good too. And the best part is it can be used for good. So that's where I'm going with this. I'm going with the good. On the days i feel tired, I'm going for a walk. When my vision is bad, I'm going to go out somewhere that I've never been no matter how hard it is to navigate an unknown place. When I feel down I'm going to reach out to someone else who needs encouragement.  Whatever negative comes my way, I'm doing the opposite. I know there will still be days ahead where I feel terrible and have a hard time pushing through. But I know that God will be right there with me giving me the strength and whatever else I need to get through. He still totally has a plan in all this and I trust Him more than anything. He is the reason I've made it this far. He is my everything.

So as I start this week of double chemo y'all better watch out!! This chic is kicking some boo-tay!! Oh ya!!